Coventry With a crazy over-the-top title like "We're Going to Eat You!", you should already know not to expect a cannibal film with nail-biting suspense and/or disturbing shock sequences, but more of a deranged black comedy with absurd situations and a light-headed ambiance. It all depends on your personal sense of humor, of course, but I thought this was a truly relaxing and imaginative Hong Kong cult film! There's not much of a storyline, but the gazillion Kung-Fu fighting sequences are masterfully choreographed and indescribably spectacular. On more than one occasion during these grotesque fights, I wondered how the hell it was possible for certain people to be so ingeniously pliant! The story's hero is Special Agent 999 who, in his quest to arrest the wanted criminal Rolex (I guess he steals watches) travels to an island inhabited by a strange community of cannibalistic weirdos. Agent 999 teams up with an eccentric loner and the only vegetarian girl in town to battle his way off the island again. The script limits itself to showing how 999 & C° get captured by the cannibals and how they subsequently fight their way out of the bubbling cauldrons again, so you really shouldn't consider watching this HK-splatter flick for its intelligent dialogs or slowly oozing suspense. The fights are funny and creative, with the roller-skating sequence as the absolute highlight, and also quite gory, since many of 999's opponents meet their death on sharp cooking objects like meat cleavers and butcher knives. The acting skills of the performers are modest, but they're artists of a different breed! Norman Chu, Eddy Ko and Melvin Wong know copious amounts of exhilarating Kung Fu moves and these definitely compensate for the lack of competent plotting. "We're Going To Eat You" is honestly one of the most entertaining & unpretentious horror-comedy hybrids I ever had the pleasure of seeing. Warmly recommended to watch with a bunch of friends on a lazy Saturday evening.

BA_Harrison Switching from gross-out gore, to slapstick comedy, to entertaining martial arts mayhem in the blink of an eye, 'We're Going To Eat You' grabs your attention from the word go and doesn't let go until the credits roll.Tsui Hark's second movie as a director sees Norman Chu as Agent 999 who, whilst tracking down the notorious bandit Rolex (Eddy Ko) on a remote island, stumbles upon a town inhabited by cannibals. Agent 999 spends the majority of the movie avoiding being filleted and served as a main course, only to be captured when he arrives back on the mainland. But with the help of some unlikely allies, some firecrackers and a couple of handy pairs of roller-skates, the good guys fight back and kick major cannibal ass!! This totally mad movie feels as though Tsui Hark made things up as he went along, but this only adds to the brilliance of the film—all semblance of logic quickly goes out of the window and it soon becomes apparent that anything might happen, and probably will.Even with the occasional lull in the action, the loads of blood and guts, nicely choreographed fights courtesy of Corey Yuen, and truly unforgettable characters (including a sex mad giant of a woman and some of the ugliest actors ever committed to celluloid), ensure that We're Going To Eat You is solid trashy entertainment from start to finish.

EVOL666 WE'RE GOING TO EAT YOU is definitely one of the stranger films I've seen in a while...and honestly one of the more enjoyable. It's a very strange hybrid of kung-fu action, cannibal horror, and comedy - with some really off the wall scenes, and some decent gore.This one has a special government agent (known as agent 999) who goes to a remote island village to track down and arrest a notorious thief. Turns out the villagers are all cannibals who dine on unsuspecting visitors. Gore and hilarity ensue early on as our hero has numerous misadventures with the local townspeople which include various freaks, crazed mask-wearing butchers, a giant transvestite, and the towns chief - a greedy dick who hordes all the "meat" for himself and his security team, leaving almost nothing for the townspeople to live on.This could have been a really dark film considering the subject matter, but WE'RE GOING TO EAT YOU is intentionally handled as a comedy with all sorts of goofiness to lighten the film - including the insatiable transvestite that doesn't take "no" for an answer, and a hilarious kung-fu segment involving roller-skates and fire-crackers. Many cross-genre films don't really work - but WE'RE GOING TO EAT YOU pulls it off. A great Sunday afternoon diversion - especially with a few drinks in ya...8/10

Joseph P. Ulibas We're Going to Eat You (1980) is a horror-action-comedy from the legendary film maker Tsui Hark. After debuting with his equally bizarre BUTTERFLY MURDERS, Mr. Tsui returns with this homage to the Italian Zombie films and kung-fu flicks of the seventies. Filled with blood, gore and sound clips from the Italian Prog-Rock band Goblin, this movie is a must see for any survival horror film fans. This one was also heavily influenced by the films of Ruggero Deodato, Umberto Lenzi and Tobe Hopper. Not your ordinary kung-fu film!Several people have disappeared on a remote island near Hong Kong. The people of this island are all insane and crave the taste of human flesh. They feed on unsuspecting visitors and escaping fugitives. One day a government agent named 999 (Norman Tsui) is in the area looking for a long time federal fugitive named Rolex (Melvin Wong). After being robbed by a fellow traveler and left to die in a trap, Agent 999 comes across the mad residents of the island's city. No one wants to co-operate. So after beating up a few locals, the chief of police (Eddy Ko) grants him an audience and points him in the direction of a nearby slaughterhouse. Foolishly, he heads off to the house and nearly winds up on the residents' plate.Despite all of the evidence presented to him and meeting the fugitive Rolex, he refuses to believe that the islanders are cannibals. The chief is fed up with Agent 999's snooping and decides to get rid of him. The runaway thief is also hiding out in town and he witnesses' first hand the barbaric cannibalism and tries to warn the police chief. He winds up being chased by the police who are in cahoots with the cannibals. Desperate to escape the pot, the thief uses the chimney technique to flee the hungry cops. He even uses a cat as a weapon. But all to no avail, the thief is captured and thrown in a cell waiting to be eaten.Rolex is sick of the cannibals and tries to help Agent 999. The chief suspect's Rolex's treachery and kills him dead. Still in denial, Agent 999 skins off Rolex's tattoo and leaves the village. He doesn't get far and is captured. In despair and praying for help from anyone, Agent 999 is about to be sliced and diced before the thief (who escaped earlier thanks to a friendly local) frees Agent 999 and helps the kid and the agent kill the captors and look for the kid's sister. Agent 999 has no luck because he's captured again. The chief is taking no chances and wants to slice him up in public. Before he can, the thief and the kid fight off the cannibals using a couple of pairs of roller skates and a case of firecrackers.The desperate trio rescue the girl and leave for the beach. They find a hidden raft and take it to safety. A crazed lone cannibal jumps on the raft and attacks the three dudes. Agent 999 goes psycho and kills the man with his bare hands. Saitified, the agent swims out the rescue the thief and the kid. When they return, they scream in horror as the sister has ripped the dead man's heart out and holds it out for all to see. She's very hungry.A pretty down beat ending for a crazy movie. This was made during Tsui Hark's "dark period". He made three depressing films BUTTERFLY MURDERS, WE'RE GOING TO EAT YOU and the very rare DON"T PLAY WITH FIRE. Filled with a lot of gore, toilet humor and some wild stunts and fight scenes.Highly recommended.