popcorninhell Many relatively young directors have fallen into the Hollywood trap as of late. It's become a sadly common pattern: a new filmmaker makes a decent film with a comparatively small budget and wouldn't you know, they're picked up to do the new Spider-Man film. Coaxed into the studio fold by big paychecks and "full studio support," many of these poor talents are attached to long gestating franchise projects that have already been tinkered with by executive producers, marketing departments and countless script doctors. By the time they get on-board, their biggest challenge isn't story- boarding the perfect shot or translating the themes of the script to the screen, but quarterbacking everyone's escalating expectations. It's a shame too, because when a project fails, no one blames the marketing team or the stars, or the studio executives; they blame the director.From top left: Colin Trevorrow, David Ayer, Marc Webb, Josh Trank Some filmmakers have managed to escape the larger studio system and despite the lack of financial support, forged some very successful careers. Richard Kelly is sadly not one of those filmmakers. Since the pop- cult resilience of Donnie Darko (2001) made his name synonymous with metaphysical science-fiction, the man has been trying to recreate that magic for years, with some pretty kooky concepts to no avail. While The Box (2009) has its weird charm, Southland Tales has everything Kelly has done beat by sheer ambition. It's big, it's dense and it's a huge f***king mess. Like Jupiter Ascending (2014), knocked up at the senior prom, kind of mess. A science-fiction epic that has the temerity to be as dour and self-righteous as a sermon yet as patently ridiculous as a KFC out of chicken.Southland Tales takes place in an alternative reality where citizens of the United States are under constant surveillance and a nuclear disaster some years ago has left much of the world in an ebbing state of anarchy and uncertainty. To prevent energy shortages, a company called Treer created a massive power plant they call Fluid Karma off the coast of L.A., which harnesses the natural ocean currents to provide safe and environmentally friendly energy. Problem is, this method of creating energy also slows down the rotation of the earth and rips holes into the fabric of space time...yeah, you kinda just have to go with it.Instead of opting for a straightforward story, Southland attempts a hyper-link narrative, with multiple characters interweaving themselves into each other stories. Instead of resembling the elegance of the Higgs Field however, this narrative ploy makes the movie look like a knot of undecipherable nuttiness. Major characters include Miranda Richardson as a porn director and part-time revolutionary, Sarah Michelle Gellar as an adult film star, Justin Timberlake as an Iraq War veteran and Seann William Scott who plays two-to-four versions of cop and soldier twins who also have alternative dimension counterparts. Yet out of all the confusing sub-stories and awkward loopty-loops that this movie makes, the image of Kevin Smith playing a paraplegic war vet, is by all accounts the weirdest thing about this movie.With so many plates wobbling precariously in the air, you'd think the ensemble cast would at least try to keep a veneer of professionalism. Yet at best, half of the ensemble seems invested in this film and not the ones you'd expect. Wallace Shawn does a commendable job as Fluid Karma inventor Baron von Westphalen (oh I see what you did there). Likewise John Larroquette's adviser to a drab California senator seems completely out of another movie. Yet for every understated performance there's a scenery-chewing C-list comedian aggressively sabotaging the entire ordeal by playing to the cheap seats. I'm looking at you Cheri Oteri, Nora Dunn, Jon Lovitz and Amy Poehler!Then there's Dwayne Johnson whose campy portrayal of an amnesic action star is an unintentional triumph amid performances both turgid and wacky. Every scene he's in has the light humorous touch of a Stephen Colbert comedy bit, complete with a meta lack of self- awareness. He's like a bright orange traffic cone in the middle of a pot-holed street; a peacock amid sparrows; a jester amid an execution. If he looked directly at the camera and winked knowingly, I would have checked- off Southland Tales as one big elaborate performance piece worthy of a gander.Unfortunately he never does. Regrettably there are far more scenes where we don't see what The Rock is cooking; instead following the guy from American Pie (1999) through Marxist revolutionaries, Tinseltown grotesqueness, and political and corporate corruption. As a protagonist/s of sorts, Seann William Scott looks so out of his depth that the audience feels almost embarrassed for him. I'm sure Scott is a nice person, and perhaps one day we'll see his range, but with a career of playing childish doofuses, seeing him in this abstract ode to wrongheaded pretension is just sad.In fact, this entire debacle is just sad; especially given that if you cock your head and squint, you can kind of see what Richard Kelly was going for. A few parts David Lynch, a dollop of Russ Meyer, a few casual insights from Tesla, Einstein and Feynman. Add in Justin Timberlake lip-synching The Killers and smear it with a bucket of blood, spit and bile. That's Southland Tales in a nutshell; a $12 million angry suicide note telling Hollywood if you try to work with me again, I'll be taking other careers down with me. In this case, there's no one to blame but the director.

Joshua H. "Southland Tales" is Richard Kelly's follow up film to "Donnie Darko" (2001), which is considered the greatest cult film of all time. "Southland Tales" premiered at the 2006 Cannes International Film Festival, where it was met with heavily negative reviews but was nominated for the Palme d'Or. Kind of ironic. "Southland Tales" is about Boxer Santaros (a movie celebrity who is married to Madeline Frost, the daughter of political candidate Senator Bobby Frost) who mysteriously returns from the desert to pursue his new screenplay "The Power", which he co-wrote with Krista Now (a porn star who hosts her own reality TV show which talks about "teen horniness", she also has an ability to tell the future, and has links with the secret underground group that call themselves the Neo Marxists). Ronald Taverner, an LAPD cop (who holds the secret behind a grand conspiracy, and also works with the Neo Marxists) plans to act as his twin brother Roland Taverner, (who is the actual cop, and is being held hostage by the Neo Marxists) to stage a double murder with Boxer Santaros accompanying him in an attempt to negatively affect Senator Bobby Frost's campaign and to destroy US IDENT (an organization that keeps everybody under surveillance 24/7. Which is also run by Bobby Frost's wife Nana Mae Frost). Pilot Abilene is an Iraqi war vet (who was severely injured in Iraq due to "friendly fire" by Ronald Taverner, who accidentally threw a grenade in his direction.) who was a movie star but was drafted to go off to Iraq to fight WW3. He now has a severely giant scar around his face from the "friendly fire" incident. Abilene now smuggles "straight up" Fluid Karma, (which is a new found power source found in the ocean just off the coast of Jerusalem, which serves as a global, wireless, fuel) which in this case is used as a drug that is injected into the neck which can make you "talk to God without even seeing him", or lip sinking to The Killers "All These Things That I've Done" while dancing with a dozen women dressed as Marilyn Monroe. Abilene is the narrator/ fortune teller/ God's point of view throughout the entire movie. He spends most of his time reading the Bible, specifically the Book of Revelations, which plays a major role in the story of the film. Finally there is Baron Von Westphalen, the discoverer and founder of Fluid Karma, who is also behind a top secret undercover science experiment run by Simon Theory (who is actually Kevin Smith). The way to describe "Southland Tales" is the Kardashians meet "Donnie Darko" meet "Magnolia" (1999). Now I will be completely honest I did not like this film originally, this is a film you have to watch more than once to fully appreciate. Now I have read analyzed reviews of the film, which helped me understand the film the second time around. After watching it a handful of times I will openly admit that this is a great movie. I'd like to categorize this film under the "it's so good it's bad" category. Kelly brought to life a work of pure originality and imagination, and was canned for it. "Southland Tales" is probably not if the most original film I've ever seen. What I don't like most about people who HATE this film is that they constantly say "I didn't understand it." Well guess what I didn't understand it at first and so did many other people. Nobody knew what "Mulholland Dr." (2001) was about when they saw it but it's considered a masterpiece,, people didn't and still don't understand "2001: A Space Odyssey", and it's considered one of the greatest films ever made. Just because you don't understand a film doesn't mean you have to hate on it. Look around the convoluted story and see the great acting, cinematography, and at times cheesy looking CGI. The thing with films that are so original and unique is that I can't hate them for being different and non-mainstream; that's why I appreciate/admire most of David Lynch's work, I may not like his films but I can't hate them for being so unique and original.The thing with this film is that it just didn't find its audience. This film was so ahead of its time for 2006, until now in 2016 we can relate a lot to how our technology, politics, and society is just as crazy as it was in "Southland Tales". US IDENT sees everything and spies on people 24/7, much like how people can track our history and location with cameras and computer chips nowadays. This film's depiction of the future was completely spot on despite it not exactly happening in 2008.One thing I must stress out is that there is a lot of footage that was cut from the movie to make it much shorter and less confusing, I'm all for that but Kelly and his editor took out a lot of important information from the film. For example the character of Simon Theory did not have an introduction in the film, he was just some guy in a wheelchair with a big beard. From the footage that was cut from the film he was introduced and you knew what purpose he had in the film besides being the Santa Clause version of Kevin Smith. General Teena MacArthur was a character that was cut completely from the film, and actually helped explain some things about US IDENT. And one other thing, what the hell is Curtis Armstrong and Jon Lovitz doing in this film!? I'm not saying they're bad actors, it's just that they barely played a significance in the film and I felt their talent was very underutilized. Overall "Southland Tales" is one of the best worst films I've ever seen. I really don't suggest this film to people, I'll let you decide if you want to watch it or not.

SnoopyStyle On July 4, 2005, nuclear explosions devastate Texas. It's the start of WWIII. America turns militaristic. Three years later, California is the key to the presidential race. Republicans are generally winning politics. There is a leftist neo-Marxist movement. There is a new government force USIDent which controls cyberspace and surveillance. Middle east oil is cut off and scientists have developed a new power source Fluid Karma using quantum entanglement. Boxer Santaros (Dwayne Johnson) is a key republican who goes missing and returns with amnesia. He has info with Krysta Kapowski (Sarah Michelle Gellar) who is reality porn star Krysta Now. Roland Taverner (Seann William Scott) is a cop or a copy of the cop who is giving Santaros a ride-along.This is an ambitious movie from Richard Kelly who made Donnie Darko. He's allowed to be let loose and that is its major problem. It has so much that it becomes quite a mess. It has way too much. It is unexplainable and illogical. It's a conspiracy nut's wet dream. Somebody needs to hold him back. There are bits and pieces that I really like. I love SWS watching his delayed reflection. I like some of the silly humor. Generally, I don't like the cinematography or directing style or the overly complicated world. It looks like a cheap compromise. I appreciate the ambition but this is not a good movie in most sense. It is a mishmash of weird ideas.

funkyfresh91 I'm surprised this movie has such a low review given its ripeness for cult-status. Here it is: unlike most movies you'll see nowadays it helps having a basic understanding of what you're getting into with "Southland Tales". Like this director's debut, Donnie Darko, this movie doesn't quite fit into just one genre. What you have is like a Mars Volta blend of different genres supercharged into a colorful, functional conflagration of concepts and some stupendously zany characters. This movie works because it doesn't take itself seriously; it's like it emerged from an ooze of vibrant science fiction, B movie horror, and Terry Gilliam-type fantasy, set in a quasi- realistic near-future more hilarious than Idiocracy but more disturbing than the dystopias in movies like Total Recall or Blade Runner. It's not gritty, it's gooey and fluorescent, and I'm pretty sure it's breathing- and the genius of the movie: whether you're in for something of a mind-bender you can break apart and chew on for a while, or you just want to watch something brainless and fun, it functions both ways. If you don't want to think about every detail, break apart each characters story and purpose, don't under any circumstance, because that's what ruins the movie for a lot of people. They realize there's more to the movie, but all they see is the goofiness, and if you can't get past that goofiness on your first go-around, just embrace it and enjoy it without trying to analyze too much. If you ARE into over-analyzing, i don't want to give anything away, but there are some wonderful references to Shakespeare, particularly Macbeth, worth looking for.The story is based on the book of Revelations in the bible, I've never read it, but i've been reading about it online. Quick summary: Justin Timberlake with eye shadow is witnessing a series of events that lead up to the end of the world, all taking place in a region of the future North America, called Southland. Scientists discover quantum teleportation and with it, clean, renewable energy. An actor and a soldier are both mysteriously teleported, which clones their bodies. They wake up with amnesia and are kidnapped by some of the outlandish "power-players" of this dystopian California. There are hints that if any clones were to meet each other and shake hands, the fabric of space-time would collapse because as everyone knows, no two identical forms can exist in the same space at the same time. While there are other side-stories for every character, this is literally ALL you need to know if you're just watching this movie to be entertained.This movie deserves at least 7 stars for presenting what I would consider a more realistic future world than similar sci-fi, with a traceable history to explain how it changed. Also there are some excellent references to literature, and some very cool metaphors that are fun to figure out. And the movie cover is the upside down flag, fo' shizzle