Woodyanders
Spunky undercover narcotics officer Jackie (a winningly perky performance by Connie Stevens) goes out of her way to take down a drug-smuggling ring run by the nefarious Philip Bianco (smoothly essayed with gusto to spare by Cesare Danova). Writer/director Howard Avedis tells the enjoyably goofy story at a snappy pace and maintains an engaging breezy tone throughout. The sturdy cast of reliable pros helps a whole lot: The immortal Big Bill Smith hits it out of the ballpark once again with his supremely nasty portrayal of the vicious Carl Henrich, Norman Burton grouches it up with crusty aplomb as the huffy Chief Frank O'Brien, John Davis Chandler excels in one of his trademark slimy creep roles, and Greg Evigan contributes a likable turn as amiable hunk Alan. Connie's vivacious personality and bubbly charm keeps the picture humming (and Connie even bares her beautifully bountiful boobs as well!). The ineptly staged action scenes and occasional clumsy use of strenuous slow motion provide a wealth of unintentional belly laughs. The surprise bummer ending packs a wicked punch. The energetic groovy score hits the right-on swinging spot. Good trashy fun.
Max Power (kowalski_91)
...Definitely not this flick. But having said that, this is one of the true examples of grindhouse at its finest. Connie Stevens plays Sgt. Jackie Parker, who likes to screw and screw around, more than she likes to do her job. But when she isn't getting her chimney swept, she does a pretty good job at being a cop. Her latest case involves a couple of international junk smugglers, transporting the goods through unsuspecting tourists. That's the who; now the how (they call me Busta-- Busta Rhymes): inside of "priceless" antiques, the junk is smuggled. So when the customer receives his or her fartifact, Philip (Connie's latest case) takes the purchase to be "cleaned," when in fact, the dope is simply extracted.Anyway, Connie (when she's not modeling her newest "assets" in the lake or in the shower) manages to orchestrate the perfect plan. Because she's managed to acquire the friendship of Philip and his wife, he uses HER to smuggle his latest shipment of heroin when his regular guy falls ill. This works out perfectly, because she now knows the junk's every move.After a lengthy (which is good, VERY good) chase involving a bike, a dune buggy, a train and a helicopter, Connie pops a cap in Philip's crown, and the credits roll.The flick's one and only sex scene winds up with Connie's partner getting a harpoon in the back, while Philip's foes (who try to make out with the junk) tie up miss Stevens and leave her for dead.Anyway, the reason I came across this gem is because it was on the Drive-In Network (Expresvu channel 333), and bought a 16mm print of it a few days later because it was THAT entertaining.So if you come across it either on tape or (if it's even in existence) DVD, I HIGHLY recommend checking it out.NINE hairy thumbs up.
pepe4u22
I had the misfortune of watching this movie that I picked up as a throw-in at a garage sale. I should have left it. The premise of the movie is believe it or not Connie Stevens as a crime fighter. Connie Stevens is totally miscast and totally unbelievable. Connie was only believable when she was taking off her clothes or making out with her boyfriend when she had to do acting well I have seen more range chili dipping wedge shots at my local golf range. When she tried to do action scenes running or handling weapons I was looking for her beautician and stylist to come and help her. When she handled a gun I was waiting for her to shoot herself in the foot. If this was a black comedy or a satire on action movie I may have given it a 3. Since the lowest rating is a one this is what I gave it. This is a movie that starlets make when they reach that certain age (Ms. Stevens in reality was never really a star any particular stature unless you look at who she married.) The movie did show her true range when she had her clothes off unfortunately since her voice and when she tried to act tough I literally had to pause the movie since I was laughing too hard. I only recommend this if you are truly wanting a step on the bizarre side.
John Seal
This bizarre crime drama stars Connie Stevens as undercover narc Jackie Parker, out to bust the junk smuggling ring commanded by Cesare Danova. There's tons of action: shoot 'em ups, outrageous chase sequences, Connie taking a shower...but the best part of the movie is watching Connie chase the bad guys in what appear to be her pajamas. Add in the fact that the film bears no relation to its odd title, and you have a late night classic.