Happy Flower I marked "contains spoilers" because there's no way not to spoil this movie in a review. In fact, you will have it all figured out in the first 5 minutes anyway, so it's really just about watching it all play out.Watch Slater from Saved by the Bell get kidnapped at gunpoint by an insane Sabrina the teenage witch and be held hostage in a secluded cabin with her clueless family that ignore his constant, desperate pleas for help. Watch as Sabrina's family fall in love with Slater within the first 3 minutes of meeting him - even though the explanation for his hysterical cries of kidnapping are due to a serious anxiety problem that, if true, would put any reasonable person on alert immediately - as they rationalize away the huge amount of evidence that their daughter's new romance isn't all that it seems.Bask in the spirit of the holidays while watching insane Sabrina's family - frisky drunken Grandma obviously included - and Slater's terrible girlfriend act out every cliché b-story from the past decade in the background of this extremely predictable "love story".If you are a fan of horrible acting, embarrassing dialogue, predictably bad writing and inappropriate sexy bondage jokes delivered by the creepiest gas station attendant this side of the Hills Have Eyes then you and your family are in for a holiday treat. I am a fan of the above and loved this movie. It was so bad that after watching, I immediately started calling my friends and family to spread the love so we could all laugh together. It was truly awful. Slater's acting is indescribably bad. I am making this movie a holiday tradition in my home.

Matthew McNaughton Now, this is a TV movie, so it's given certain graces like having a limited audience and unsurprising expectations of mediocrity, so I can't belittle it too much. But it's just so thrown together and sloppy. Melissa Joan Hart of "Sabrina" fame starts off with an abysmal perm, and of course she's a struggling artist who waitresses part-time. But then it's all aboard the train to Crazyville. Somehow her parents believe her and not the loony man she brought. The guy (Mario Lopez) then decides that it would be a good idea to make her family fall in love with him. The big reveal is when he fake proposes to her (which he was originally was going to do to his girlfriend when he was kidnapped). I definitely can't say it's that bad; it's just weird five ways to Friday and shouldn't be taken too seriously.

Amy Adler Trudie Chandler (Melissa Joan Hart) is a poor NYC artist who works as a waitress to make ends meet. Unfortunately, her parents (Markie Post and Timothy Bottoms) are stuffy, rich, and demanding. With the holidays coming, Trudie feels glad that this year she will be bringing a boyfriend along, for her parents are forever hounding her about career AND marriage. And, because her mother likes hair that is "out of the face", Trudie gives herself a tight perm and dresses conservatively for the first big get-together with the folks. Bad luck, however, arrives. Her boyfriend turns out to be a rat, who dumps Trudie on her last afternoon of work. Knowing she has to face her parents in mere hours, Trudie goes a bit "nuts". Pulling out an old, antique gun, she grabs a very cute customer, David (Mario Lopez) and "kidnaps" him for the journey ahead to her parents' upstate New York home. Naturally, he is fit to be tied, no pun intended, as Trudie secures his hands and feet in the car. Things do not improve when they get to the Chandlers grand home but, because the house is isolated, the weather is snowy and cold and Mrs. Chandler has forbidden cell phones for the holidays, he has no choice but to play along. But, once Trudie has her hair redone by her sister, begins to dress more attractively, and reveals her true sweet self, David discovers that he may have eyes for the young artist. Can you really fall in love with your kidnapper? This film is truly made for the insatiable romcom fan, of which I am one. It is totally implausible but totally irresistible at the same time. The actors, too, are quite fine, with Hart, Post, Bottoms, June Lockhart, and the rest making the most of their "stilted" characters. As for Lopez, he is the true star, for he is incredibly handsome, funny, and sensitive. The scenery in upstate New York is lovely, the costumes are well chosen, the script is absurdly snappy, and the other film amenities more than adequate. So, romantic comedy lovers, if you don't get cable (this was originally an ABC Family film), try to find this one before the next holiday rolls around. No one will have to handcuff you to the sofa, for you will be completely enthralled with this tale of Xmas love.

freakfire-1 This movie sure did have a lot of sexual puns for an ABC Family holiday special. It wasn't just here and there, but it was damn near every 2-3 minutes. And Mario Lopez seems to still be a man of affection for lonely and/or rich girls. Because he got the attention of 3, including the grandma, in this movie.Anyway, Mario Lopez is taken hostage. Yes it can be done and no you should not do it. Because if you do that, he might think its an acting gig. The reason for this kidnapping is because Melissa Joan Hart lost her boyfriend and needs a new one to take home to the family.And this just opens up a whole bunch of sexual innuendos and secrets the family is keeping from each other. Yet somehow Mario and Melissa end up happy together. Huh. A corny Christmas love story.While the ending is casual, the material is not. So because it was actually funny at times, it gets a decent grade. Aside for the scene at the beginning, it all ties in too. "C+