dinerfood-901-211557 "Hell squad hell squad we're the best, don't ever put us to the test. We're a helluva of a fighting machine, we are tough and goddamn mean. The hell squad girls gotta lot of sass, if you mess with us we'll kick your ass." Uh, sure anytime. You can actually start anywhere in the movie and start watching. I picked this point where they where matching and all had matching short-shorts with some type of beret and chanting the above ditty. After a few weeks each one is commando trained and an expert in their field, according to the recruiter. The filmmakers had a great time making this thing. The only thing that it lacks was a group shower scene. Lots of Hollywood bunny "actors" from small town Idaho and New Jersey (probably). After trekking out with jeeps they kill a group of Arab soldiers, who can't fight, then they go back to the hotel and take another group bath. On and on it just never ends. Don't think we'll get a blue ray anytime soon.

actionfilm-2 Location: The Middle EastTime: 1986Situation: The only son of an important and wealthy diplomat is kidnapped by middle eastern terrorists. The desperate dad is willing to try anything to save his offspring.Solution: Hell Squad, a crack team of curvy female commandos.The distraught diplomat asks his American friend "the government is powerless saheb, where can I turn to for help?", to which his sage sidekick responds "Las Vegas!".Cut to a second rate sin city stage act with a bevy of beauties dancing crudely to champagne music. Later in the dressing room the girls all voice displeasure with the job and it's lack of proper compensation. Cue the diplomat's American friend, as he arrives with a generous but dangerous offer, to select and train several of them for deadly combat so as to rescue the diplomat's son, for which they will be payed handsomely. To the dancers this sounds like such a hair brained scheme that it...just...might...work! The showgirl soldiers are so game for the mission that they compose a poor but spirited excuse for a cadence, chanting the not entirely difficult "Hell Squad, Hell Squad!!". What follows is equally absurd and so poorly executed, it's like watching G.I.Jane directed by Demi Moore's 5 year old. A sampling:-in a combat scene, a girl tosses a knife so limply it arcs towards the ground unable to make it out of frame. The next moment we see the blade rocket into someone's chest 30 feet away.-Hell Squad receives it's marching orders, not by code over a shortwave radio as they camp in desert terrain, but rather on the luxury hotel room phone. The Squad leader is informed where the terrorists are, and when they'll be there. Zero drama is involved as she cheerfully responds "okay, we'll be there, thank you very much" as if confirming a salon appointment.-At daybreak, the Hell Squad leaves to engage in fierce combat. They return exhausted at the end of the day for a glass of champagne and a group soak in an over-sized hot tub. And no, the hot tub is not an excuse for the gratuitous nudity exhibited by the women, the filmmakers don't appear concerned with making an actual motion picture, let alone excuses.If you find yourself tired at how quality ridden some films are, or you need a break from the logic and coherence seen in much of cinema, you could do worse than Hell Squad.

Jung Tampo From the cheesy dialog to the no-talent 'actresses', there is not one redeeming quality about this 'film'!About the point these commando bikini-models were putting on their flippers and snorkel gear to swim across a lake in a middle of a desert to a stock photograph of a castle in the European mountains I lost my lunch.The biggest laugh of the movie was the reveal of 'Ann' as 'Andy' when a halloween budget mask was pulled off of Ann/Andy. Couldn't help but think of Austin Powers, "That's a MAN, man!"So bad it's laughable! If there was a ZERO STAR rating this movie would have it!

purakek The "movie" (it's so cheaply done, I'm inclined to believe it's just a student film gone bad) is just an excuse to parade scantily-clad women in the desert, let them go after the bad arabs and whine for the rest of the show. There's little action (you'd think they'd at least learn martial arts; no!!! they fight like, duh, girls!) and lots of boring dialog. SPOILER!!!: The ending (finding out who the traitor is), which involves proper toilet manners for women (figure it out: it involves keeping the seat up), reveals a cross-dresser villain in their midst (ok, in the office that recruited them). Whatever pompous theme this movie supposedly maintains (e.g., equality among the sexes, world corruption, security) is lost in the mindless miasma of ennui and inanity. A poor man's Doll Squad (not that Francine York and company are any better!).