GL84 Asked to look into her brother's disappearance, a private eye tracks him to a secret whorehouse hidden underneath a funeral home which houses a vampire coven run by a vicious vampire queen and together they team up to stop them from taking over the town.There's quite a lot to really like with this one. One of the film's better points here is the rather light-hearted and silly tone present here which gives this one quite the fun and enjoyable setup. It's a lot of fun to watch as a goofy, entertaining effort featuring the idea of the funeral home working in conjunction with the sanctity of the church, which isn't that original but it still works here in giving this one the kind of ironic and goofy set-up required for one of these efforts. Going alongside this is the manner of this one featuring the outside relics that are featured here, from the ancient talisman that controls her to the use of the protective applications to allow them to walk around in the daylight without injury and the manner of how they go ahead recruiting victims to their hideout which all makes the storyline incredibly fun and adds some nice sleaze to the proceedings. From the concept of the bordello offering plenty of fun here with the topless workers parading around for the unwary victims, the several attempts to engage in tortuous sexual acts using the different devices to hold them in order to feed and the numerous scenes involving them around the strippers or topless clientele gives this one quite a strong sleaze quotient which has a lot to like overall. That also likes the fact that the fun vampire antics here are rather fun, with the initial attacks on the patrons inside the brothel, the initial scene of the detective working through the investigation which gives this a solid and workable middle half that keeps this moving as well as some enjoyable vampire action in the finale as there's the fun of the massacre of the club workers, the different brawls in their underground hideouts and the final assault at the TV station has a lot of great moments with the vampire in control and the main resolution to stop them. Alongside the nice comedy and rather fun gore, there's a lot to like here to hold it up over the minor flaws featured. The main issue to be found here is the fact that there are way too many scenes that go on way too long to really let the jokes fizzle out before they have a chance to land. The opening in the tomb is quite overlong and lets the joke of his stature compared to the men go on way too long before she finally awakes, and the continuous jokes about the girl being in the stripclubs in the area makes for a one-note joke that takes up a whole scene of her interviewing the vampire and it just leaves this with overlong scenes that hold up the running time somewhat. Likewise, the amount of goofy cheese featured here might be too much for some to take because of this, and they really are what holds it back.Rated R: Nudity, Graphic Violence, Extreme Graphic Language, fetish sexual acts and mild drug use.

Ben Larson With Dennis Miller, you can expect that this will not be the usual Vampire movie. He makes constant references to movies, TV stars, and other personalities throughout. It is hard to believe that he didn't get writing credit as i imagine many of the lines were his. That's just a guess.Dennis certainly has his eyes on Erika Eleniak (Under Siege) throughout, as do we. Unfortunately, that is reserved for Steven Seagal.It also features Angie Everhart (First to Die) as the head vampire. The first fire-top on Glamour magazine, Angie didn't give us the display she had in Jade, but she was hot hot hot throughout. Unfortunately, she was really hot towards the end.Lots of gore and sexual innuendo.We did get treats from Kiara Hunter as Tamara, Leslie Ann Phillips as Patrice, and Juliet Reagh as Tallulah.

pistolaro_amigo Tales From the Crypt should always be taken for what it is... entertainment in horror fashion by appealing to underage people with juvenile humor and absurd plots. And I down that spoonful every time. The running time flies by without hesitation that I have repeated viewings of this movie to see what I missed, and it has grown on me as if Angie Everheart's fangs have sunken themselves into my jugular. Angie's acting is horrendous as this is her feature debut but as long as her body talks who cares what is said. Dennis Miller provides his own variation to the know-it-all gumshoe, but could've faired better by losing the tight stonewashed jeans and slipped into some slacks. His humor goes beyond the average 16 year old that this film should've based its audience around, but he is trying to reach a higher level after all above this schlock. Erika Elenik as a televangelist producer... spot on in the absurdity! Corey Feldman and Chris Sarandon were apparently in on the joke for they just absorb the role and play it for the s**t and giggles as it is. Being a self-professed TFTC fanatic, I enjoyed the in-jokes that are within this movie (especially the key from Demon Knight) but the in-jokes were not essential as they are to other films (such as Kevin Smith flicks). This movie was never aimed to mentally impair you with horrific images, it was made for the fore-mentioned crowd and should be taken in that same vein... just make sure Angie Everheart is sucking from it

freakfire-1 Why couldn't have people thought this up before 1996? You know, putting Dennis Miller in a horror/comedy where he has the chance of being eaten? Alas, this isn't for real and so Dennis Miller's chances of dying aren't as high.This all surrounds a woman/vampire, Angie Everhart, who was brought back to life doing the work of a televangelist in a whore house/mortuary. Yes its a little corny but you have to work with it. A secret whore house at a mortuary is a little odd.Like all movies of this caliber, it seems like the problem is solved. But only there is a small twist at the end. The twist is not entirely unexpected as is even modestly funny. But that is all I can give it.Overall, the effects don't live up to today's standards and maybe not even 1996 ones. But the story isn't bad and the acting is alright. So it turns out average, which is good for a B-movie like this. "C"