charleshutler 1985 is an intense dive into a dysfunctional family dynamic that has drained some part of the life out of each member of the family. We can guess fairly early on that Adrian is sick and suspect he is gay, but by not clearly expressing it early on, the film asks us to examine the family more universally. Done in black and white and mostly tight close up shots, you can experience some of the tension and claustrophobia of each family conversation. You know you've been there at some point in your own life. You want to say something but it will disappoint Dad and hurt Mom deeply so you stall and stall and eventually say nothing. I found the scenes with the ex girlfriend the least satisfying and awkward. However she plays an important part for the future of the younger brother, for whom I felt great sadness. He really needs his big brother, but Adrian needed his own chance at freedom and moved away. On this visit Adrian tries to reestablish some connection with his brother while protecting him from the consequences of his decisions since fleeing the family home.

chong_an 3 years earlier, as soon as he could, Adrian left his conservative home in Fort Worth, seeking his fortune (and himself) in New York City. Now he has returned for Christmas, to a father who is a Vietnam vet, a mother who is a closet liberal, and younger brother Andrew who has disappointed their father by dropping out of football to join the drama club.Adrian is trying to find an opening to tell his family his secrets - that he is gay, and he is dying. He already has seen his lover and friends die, and he himself is showing signs of KS. It is easier to tell a childhood female friend, and to record a cassette tape with a hopeful message for Andrew on his gift - a Walkman with a recording function.The story has parallels with It's Only the End of the World, but in this case the disease is more explicit. Also, while the parents may not approve, they may still be loving, and individually voice some degree of support.I saw this at the Inside Out film festival, and got 2 takeaways from the Q+A. Shooting in black-and-white reduces background distractions and focuses on the characters' faces. Also, at an earlier screening, the director came face-to-face with a family where reality fit the fiction - a mother with 2 gay sons, the older one dead of AIDS, the younger married to another man.